It’s OK, I have arrived.

I have been wanting to and talking about starting a blog for the last several months.  I have had one before, but then I had a baby.  My entire life changed forever, but for the better now that this little angel is in my life.

I want to start by sort of introducing myself.  I am a mom.  And that’s about all that I know about myself at the moment.  A lot has changed in my life and there has been a lot of drama!  Family drama, ex-boyfriend drama, ex-fuck boy drama, family pet drama, Netflix drama…you name it and it has happened.

I have a lot to write about and I hope to maybe let other moms (or dads) out there know that they are not alone.  While our lives may be different and our experiences may vary, one thing is consistent – the love for our little ones.  I hope this will be a place where we can share, laugh, cry, eat, and support.

I have had a few tragedies happen to me in my life, not unlike you, and I find that sharing them and carrying on helps me keep the memory and remain positive.  Daily, I also have stresses to deal with regarding my job, family, trying to be a good mommy.  And drinking helps that.  😉  Or writing and hugging my little girl.  There is not much I do anymore that is just for myself.  I have been craving an Auntie Anne’s pretzel for weeks and just can’t bring myself to drive all the way (15 minutes) to the mall just for a pretzel.  But if it was something my angel needed I’d be there already.  I am getting the feeling a lot of parents are like that.

Not my parents though.  My mom would go missing for days, drinking and drugging with “friends”.  My father did not meet me until I was six years old and after that never signed one birthday card for me.  I want to be the best I can for my little one and ensure her that I am never EVER going anywhere.  I will be the supportive, caring, strong parent that I always wanted.

Even after the way I was brought up, I love my parents and forgive them.  I love others and trust until I am shown otherwise.  I offer my ears and a shoulder no matter what; even though that usually bites me in the ass, I do it over and over and over because I have faith in humanity.  I hope this love is something I can instill in my daughter.  Love.  Forgiveness.  Trust.  Happiness.

At the same time, I am very strong and the extreme opposite of naive. I am quick to cut someone out of my life if they are unhealthy for me and I am sure that is a survival skill from my childhood.  Some of the strength is something I hope to pass on to my little girl. So, basically, I want her to be perfect like me.  😉  I have a feeling she will be everything and more.

I am looking forward to sharing more in-depth stories, writing as I watch my daughter grow and learn everyday, and possibly get to know some parents (human, cat, dog, ferret, or otherwise).  Thanks for reading and I will be back soon!



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